Mother’s day is a day many people celebrate. It’s a day where you want to be celebrated, but you also don’t want to feel selfish. You want to take care of the kids and the house, but you also really want to sleep in and hire help for the day.
For some, Mother’s day is difficult because of loss, or want, or other circumstances.
For you, Mother’s day might be one of those days that falls into your officer’s long weekend….Every….Year. But, you might be one of the lucky LEOWs that doesn’t have to worry because your officer doesn’t work weekends or has a pretty regular schedule. For many police wives, this day falls under that married, but single life I wrote about here.
So, on this Mother’s day, I’ll share my story so you know you’re not alone.
D has decided that now is the time to give up napping for the rest of his toddler life. So, bedtime has been earlier than normal and the mornings have been rough. This morning he woke up upset and over tired, so he decided the best way to start his day would be by pounding the wall next to his bed and kicking the slats on the side of his bed. Upon the noise waking me, I realized that I was slightly cold. I feared the worst and was right.
J and I co-sleep because, well, Mr. Troop works nights and breastfeeding is way easier this way when it’s just you and two kiddos. So, if you guessed that I woke up in a massive puddle of pee, you’re right.
My Mother’s day began with a toddler tantrum and a bed full of pee! It also started at 6am because my kids love me so much they decided not to sleep in.
On top of it, it’s day 3 of Mr. Troop’s long weekend which means he didn’t get home until almost 7am and he needs to sleep because he has to go back in tonight.
What do I want?
I want to be selfish. I want to crawl back into bed and take the day off. I want to be pampered and taken care of instead of the other way around. There are many other days I want to do this as well, but today is definitely the day I want off.
But, I’m a mom and a police wife, so I know that holidays are celebrated when they’re celebrated.
What did I get?
So, I dragged a heaping basket of laundry down the hallway and started the first of many loads. Then, I dragged a futon mattress up from the basement and into the living room where the three of us snuggled in and watched “The Grinch”. D had one more meltdown and a time out. Then, we shared a muffin and agreed to start over again. All before 10am!
I was just coming to terms with how my day was going to go vs how I was hoping it would when, to my surprise, Mr. Troop came downstairs.
A few minutes later, my parents came over and Mr. Troop started making one of my all time favorite breakfast foods: French toast stuffed with strawberries and cream cheese.
What did I learn?
Mother’s day isn’t about having a day off, or being pampered, or getting gifts. It’s about spending the day with the ones you love and showing them how well you love them. And, Mr. Troop was definitely speaking my love language this morning. He knows I haven’t been feeling well, that I’ve been stressed out at work, and that I won’t ask for a break even when I need one. So, he sacrificed his sleep to help me out today.
And, I loved it. He can’t do this every day, and I know that it’s killing him to only have a couple of hours of sleep before another 12 hour shift tonight. But, I so appreciate his effort.
I also know that I would have been fine with him sleeping in and having a dinner before he went to work just like any other day.
What do I know?
I know that as the wife of an officer, you have to get used to doing a lot on your own and celebrating holidays whenever and however you can.
Sometimes, you want to be selfish and you wish things were different. Sometimes, you don’t want to ask for help because you don’t want to feel selfish. And, sometimes, you get mad at your officer for being “selfish” and needing sleep instead of helping.
But, it seems that things always seem to fall into place. And, when you’ve prepared yourself for Mother’s day to be another day of you doing everything you do in a normal day, you might just be surprised at what your officer has up their sleeve.
Lastly, if you feel like you’ve been forgotten on Mother’s day because your officer is working, remember that they will celebrate you when and how they can. It’s all about compromise. Unless they really did forget. (Then, you can tear them a new one!)